Why God?

When things continually get worse and worse in our lives...where do we turn??? TRUTHFULLY!!! Do we try to run away? Turn to a friend to satisfy us? Turn to something electronical? Drive off? Or get pissed, and put others thru crap?....or do we turn to Christ??? I have been struggling sooooooo much. I really don't know what to do anymore. I feel as though I have been turning to Christ. I mean we talk, I tell him bout what I'm struggling with and do my best to thank Him continually when good things happen...but how? How do I thank him for these trials, when I'm struggling and finding nothing to do but give up in sooooo many(what seems like all) aspects of my life? I mean God, why did you take my grandma from me...She was the only spiritual role model in my life. I looked up to her very highly and did my best to follow after her good qualities. She helped me so much, and always was there to encourage me and listen. I wanted to do all I could do learn from that and do the same to others. Why did you take her? She wasn't even that old yet...and she wasn't really going downhill either. She was perfectly heathy. Why God? Why did you not keep her here so she could come to my graduation? So she could be an encouragement to me through some of the biggest times in my life... God, I don't get it! I then turned to my brother, he has been such a good example to me and has been such a GREAT protection to me through the past year...but yet you take him from me for this time... God, I don't get it! I'm not mad at you, but why? It hurts, God!!! Yet, I know you've suffered more pain then I could ever experience so I have no room to talk. But God, I can never sleep, I can never go through one day without breakdown...why God? I wanna get through this but how? I have lost all my friends, and now am left being pestered by tons of boys that have noooooo idea who you are or what you've done. How can I show them? How can I be an example to them, when all they want is either sex or something physical? How do I ditch em or get away from them? How do I protect myself from this? God, I got no one but you, I feel so alone and trapped...God! PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!! I have no clue what more I can do...I feel like I'm breaking and my whole life is crashing down around me. I want something exciting, I want something encouraging. Lord! How can I find joy with no other people in my life to influence me right, besides my big sis. How can I actually do anything besides work, without doing something wrong or getting into trouble again? Lord!!! Please show me!!! God, I don't know what to do!!! And Lord! PLEASE, help me to keep my temper!!!!!!!!!!!! But why God? Why do people have to continually put me down and hold it against me that I have such an amazing big sis that means soooooo much to me? Why is that my fault? For no reason at all will I ditch her!!!!!!! But why do people have to continually put me thru this crap and assume stuff bout her that AINT TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!